Wednesday, December 07, 2005

 

The celebrities with alot of SUCKcess

This will be my post about celebrities that are IMMENSELY overrated and that I HATE. I will not choose on soley their acting but also who the people themselves are and what they stand for. Since most of these people were kind enough to put their true selves out for people to see I will be kind enough to rip them apart and let them know that A) they are no better than us and B) they aren't as good as me. So here are my top 5 celebs of whom I HATE and are overrated.

Number 5: The Olsen Twins
Ok so everyone is probably thinking i'm crazy right?? WRONG! Talk about potential that's never been reached. These girls look like Kate Moss and her even skinnier sister. Coming up
on Full House these two girls had the world in their hands and by the time they were ready to take off to the world of big girl acting they had a very important choice to make, penthouse or playboy, and they chose neither. How disappointing is that!? Every guys dream of the olsen twins is FINALLY vanishing due to dreams of the new crop of under age wait till they're 18 girls. Jonny I'm sure is waiting for next seasons Disney lineup as we speak. Not only did they chose to not get naked, but they flat out became UGLY. I guess a steady diet of Vodka, Crack, Bob Saget will do that to you though. Here is my tip to the olsen girls, put down the crack pipe mary kate, ashley stop drinking your zimas and make a movie that doesn't involve you being twins lost in Paris.
Method of Death:
Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie fight the Olsens in a who's the skinniest Bitch match and completely destroy them due to their knowledge fighting.

Number 4: Tim Robbins
Shawshank Redemption, Arlington Road, Bull Durham you say?? How can this guy be listed as someone you say you hate?? EASY, I HATE YOU, you hippy tree huggin, susan suradan loving, know nothing about politics ass. I'm not saying I know anything about politics because honestly I don't an
d you know what, I'm fine with that because it's not my place. My place is here at work letting other worry about the stuff they know about. What does Tim Robbins know about, how to seduce women your moms age, possibly looking at his wife, however no. Tim Robbins knows about acting and in acting people tell you what to say.
Method of Death:
I wish in real life someone would slip him a line that goes a little something like this.

{Tim Robbins Enters Room and picks up shotgun}
Tim: I'm an idiot who knows nothing
{Tim pulls trigger on shotgun after pressing it against his own head}

roll credits, now that would be a box office SMASH.


Number 3: Madonna
You're old, you're annoying, I hate you!!! You're music sucks, you suck, and I bet your mom sucks too. Pick a fad and stick with it. Reinventing yourself is just another form of having no identity. You don't have one, you're nothing without being such a huge slut. You make Britney Spears look like norweigen nun. You can't dance, i don't care what anyone says. I'm not just saying that because because I hate you, I hate Michael Jackson too but he can dance.
Method of Death:
Madonna believes she's still cool and with it as she goes to a local cool night club. As she enters and no one realizes who she is and everyone refuses to dance to like a virgin she kills herself.

Number 2: Tom Cruise

THIS DUDE IS CRAZY!!! A) he's into scientology so that means B) he's a moron C) he "supposedly" impregnated Katie Holmes....i say supposedly because i think Pacey really did it (Dawson Creek reference) D) He was in War of the Worlds, possibly the worst movie EVER
Method of Death:
Tom Cruise gets REALLY deep into scientology and believes he must fly to the moon to save his REAL family. As Tom climbs to the top of the Empire State building no one stops him because everyone wants him to die. He climbs to the top and Mel Gibson pushes him off to promote "The Passion 2: Why Tom Cruise is an Idiot"

Number 1: Richard Gere
You're gay dude, admit it. The Band Marched on and so did you. I knew Pretty woman was a horrible movie but i couldn't really figure out why. Was it because Julia Roberts can be annoying.....no, was it because it's a total chick flick.....no, it was because you are GAAAAAAAY. As i sat in my sophomore year Health class we watched a scene from a movie called And The Band Marches On. You were a gay Hiv Haver and apparently you liked the part too much as when after the movie was over you retained that part. I believe I hate you the most of all because chicks dig you and I see no humanly reason too. You're say gay. You just have something about you that just screams HATE ME and i'm HAPPY to oblige.
Meathod of Death:
The year is 2025 and the cure for aids has just been found thanks to the most wealthy man ever to have HIV paying to uncover the cure Magic Johnson. Gere 2 days later comes out of the closet and announces he has aides and will do anything to get the cure from Magic. Magic then knows for the good of the world he must destroy the cure to save it from the likes of Richard Gere. 2 years later Richard Gere is dead and everyone is happy.

WORD,
UberBrad

Comments:
thanks for the info
 
Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link



<< Home

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?

Website Counter
bun and thigh max