Thursday, October 19, 2006
S*** List Update
1. Michael Moore - For being a fat obnoxious bastard.
2. Kanye West - For being an arrogant jerk that thinks he is Jesus.
3. Pamela Anderson - For sueing KFC
4. Tom Cruise - For sueing over his portrayal in a South Park episode.
5. Bode Miller - For totally bombing at the Olympics and not even caring.
6. Isaac Hayes - For quiting South Park because they made fun of Scientology.
7. Scrubbing Bubbles Automatic Shower Cleaner - This thing just plain doesn't work.
My mom had a coupon to get one for cheap so she bought one and gave it to me. I was like "alright, thats one thing I don't have to clean." Well, it totally didn't work. There was still hard water stains and soap scum. Plus I had this huge bulky objecet in my shower. DO NOT BUY THIS PRODUCT.
Right On,
UberBrian
I hate my toenails
Most people say they hate their feet, or they hate their toes because they are ugly or something. Well, I hate my toenails. Not because how they look or anything like that. They look fine. Good color, shape, and so one. I hate them because they are there, and I have to take care of them. If there is one thing I can't stand it is a long toenail. They stick to socks when I'm putting them on, they scratch my legs and feet when I sleep....I don't need that crap. I hate them so much, I pretty much trim them back to non existance. Except for the big toes. But, if it were up to me (and my wallet) I would just have them all removed.
Right On,
UberBrian
Right On,
UberBrian
Sunday, October 15, 2006
Worste TV Show EVER
So, one of the weekly staples I have is to watch Adult Swim on Sunday nights. It has a great lineup with such shows as Metalocalypse, Harvey Birdman, Robot Chicken Squidbillies, and Tom Goes to the Mayor just to name a few. But, lumped in with these funny shows is a show called 12 oz. Mouse. It is the most retarded pointless show ever. I am watching it right now, and I am physically becoming enraged at this show. Here, let me tell you what the show is about, and you can picture it perfectly.
It keeps going back and forth between two scenes. A shark trying to start a car that won't turn over, and a pink square wearing glasses, looking at harmonicas. That is it. That has been the entire show. FOR FIFTEEN F***ING MINUTES. THAT WAS THE ENTIRE SHOW!!!!!
For all the good shows I have seen tonight, this one show has managed to piss me off to a level that is not normal.
If you are interested in seeing for yourself just how bad this show is follow the link below, then scroll down the list of shows until you see 12 oz. Mouse.
http://www.adultswim.com/adultswimfix/index.jsp
Right OFF,
UberBrian
It keeps going back and forth between two scenes. A shark trying to start a car that won't turn over, and a pink square wearing glasses, looking at harmonicas. That is it. That has been the entire show. FOR FIFTEEN F***ING MINUTES. THAT WAS THE ENTIRE SHOW!!!!!
For all the good shows I have seen tonight, this one show has managed to piss me off to a level that is not normal.
If you are interested in seeing for yourself just how bad this show is follow the link below, then scroll down the list of shows until you see 12 oz. Mouse.
http://www.adultswim.com/adultswimfix/index.jsp
Right OFF,
UberBrian
Tuesday, October 10, 2006
Graarrble..mmuumpphrammmehehmm
I've awakened from my summer hibernation. It's been a pretty good summer even though I didn't do a damn thing. No concerts, no Cardinals games, didn't even go boating. Dang....what the hell did I do all summer. Oh well.
Anyway, I'm packing my stuff right now into the Uber Mobile and heading into the world of idiots and seasonal douchebags. I'll try to wake up my fellow haters on the way.
Stay Tuned
Right on,
UberBrian
Anyway, I'm packing my stuff right now into the Uber Mobile and heading into the world of idiots and seasonal douchebags. I'll try to wake up my fellow haters on the way.
Stay Tuned
Right on,
UberBrian
Wednesday, July 05, 2006
Latest Update
well its summer and we, the uberhaters, are busy doing summer stuff. UberBrian is no longer his "if i dont know you i hate you" approach and so he has not had many rants of late. i have not ran into stupid people in a long time and so i have nothing to write about. Between softball, weddings, and other trips i just have not had much time to think about anything. And i assume UberJonny and UberBrad are in the same boat as me. So sorry to all 0-2 of you that checked this site out, and a new movie review will be coming eventually.
UberRed
UberRed
Friday, June 02, 2006
Lics like Story, only it happend at Kroger
Like all great mega stores that boast 15- 40 checkout lanes Kroger had three open, luckily we (myself and my girlfriend) seemed to have hit one line just perfectly. A lady probably late forties early fifties, nicley dressed, not a skank or white trash by no means, had a cart load of things, the last of which the cashier was bagging up. We slipped in as quickly as possible, we only have a few items some of which where produce so we didn't want to fool with the self check out. We stand in line and the lady gets out her purse and the cashier hits the total button, it was around a hundred dollars, I dont remember the exact amount but it doesnt exactly matter, but her cart was full, thats the main point. As she opened her wallet she saw a coupon for 65 cents, yes 65 cents, she let the cashier know about her coupon and the cashier informed her that since she had already rang up the total the only way to use the coupon would be for her to re-scan the entire cart load. I thought well it being only a few cents the lady would put it back in the wallet and wait until her next visit, on no, it couldn't be that easy. She promptley told the cashier "I guess you better get started." Being as sarcastic and bitchy as she could possibly be.This lady was a bitch. My jaw dropped, my girlfriend said loud enuff for the bitch to hear, "You have got to be kidding me!" We stood with five items, her with probably 40 and for 65 cents she wanted to re-scan everything. We gave her a look and left the lane. I feel sorry for all people that have to deal with the public beccause the public is hard to deal with. Everyone has the moments when they wish they would have thought to say something, this was one. After the incident I wished I would have given her a dollar and told her to keep her coupon for the next trip.
-uberJonny
-uberJonny
Tuesday, May 30, 2006
MySpace All-Stars
During the day, I tend to spend some time on Myspace chatting with friends and wasting time. As anyone who uses Myspace knows, they put up random people for you to see. There are some very interesting people there. Here are some people I have found.
Bonafide tha prototype of Ballin I can only strive to be as cool.
Alex the Stampede You can ALMOST read his profile.
oooooohhhh yeah, thats what I'm talkin about
Lord of the Beach This is the perfect example of WTF?
Blackavellie I think there is a picture of the guy somewhere on the page.
Rudo I want to party with this guy.
Weilder of the Oblivion I still don't understand how people can get into this crap...publicly.
Star Wars Kid? I just linked directly to his picture page.
Not much needs to be said from me... I will let you make up your own punchlines.
I think that will do for now. As I come across more interesting people, I will let them be known.
Bonafide tha prototype of Ballin I can only strive to be as cool.
Alex the Stampede You can ALMOST read his profile.
oooooohhhh yeah, thats what I'm talkin about
Lord of the Beach This is the perfect example of WTF?
Blackavellie I think there is a picture of the guy somewhere on the page.
Rudo I want to party with this guy.
Weilder of the Oblivion I still don't understand how people can get into this crap...publicly.
Star Wars Kid? I just linked directly to his picture page.
Not much needs to be said from me... I will let you make up your own punchlines.
I think that will do for now. As I come across more interesting people, I will let them be known.
Saturday, May 27, 2006
To: The lady at Lic's
So a few of us went to see the new X-men movie last night (which was great), and afterwards, decided to treat ourselves to some ice cream at Lic's. While we were in there, a lady came in. Let me just describe what this lady looked like...From top to bottom. Her age was probably around 45ish. Now, think about those trees you see in Africa with the thin trunks, and wide canopies...now imagine, if that were a hairstyle, that was what her hair looked like. For the face, picture a possum with a lot of make up on. Add some gawdy jewelry, and a bright flower blouse tucked into pleated shorts pulled up to her boobs. Then, these scrawny veiny legs with zero definition coming down to some large sandals. Got that? Goooood.
So, this lady walks up with a large plastic cup and asks to see a manager. Keep in mind that it is a Friday night at about 10:00. Well, of course there was no manager there, just the two 16 year old employees. This lady is complaining because she couldn't get a refill for 35 cents. Instead she has to pay full price of $1.40. Since she can't gets what she wants, she just orders a suger cone with 2 scoops of ice cream. But then the clincher. She asks the kid what time they open, and then responds with, "Well, I will be waiting here for you, because you won't get away with this."
.......WHAT THE F*** IS YOUR PROBLEM??? People like this are the reason the world is going to shit. Do these people have nothing better to do on a Friday night than go around and bitch and complain because they have to pay a few more cents for soda? I thought about walking up to her and giving her a dollar and saying "Here, take my dollar that I was going to use on the bridge to get home, and shut your damn mouth!"
As much as this lady deserves a big ol' dick slap across the face, I have to thank her for bringing my Uber attitude back the surface.
So, this lady walks up with a large plastic cup and asks to see a manager. Keep in mind that it is a Friday night at about 10:00. Well, of course there was no manager there, just the two 16 year old employees. This lady is complaining because she couldn't get a refill for 35 cents. Instead she has to pay full price of $1.40. Since she can't gets what she wants, she just orders a suger cone with 2 scoops of ice cream. But then the clincher. She asks the kid what time they open, and then responds with, "Well, I will be waiting here for you, because you won't get away with this."
.......WHAT THE F*** IS YOUR PROBLEM??? People like this are the reason the world is going to shit. Do these people have nothing better to do on a Friday night than go around and bitch and complain because they have to pay a few more cents for soda? I thought about walking up to her and giving her a dollar and saying "Here, take my dollar that I was going to use on the bridge to get home, and shut your damn mouth!"
As much as this lady deserves a big ol' dick slap across the face, I have to thank her for bringing my Uber attitude back the surface.
